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Create True And Lasting Love In Your Life

Ten Things To Find Love Now

You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

1. Start by losing the losers

If you want to find your soul mate you must be available and not involved with people that aren’t right for you. Staying available is hard for a lot of singles, but necessary for finding the love of your life.

2. OK, available now? Next… are you “ready?”

Any unfinished business that might sabotage your next relationship? Legal, financial, emotional, kids, ex, employment? Get it handled!

3. Next, make a list of your top five “requirements”

Requirements are non-negotiable deal-breakers; what you must have or must not have in your relationship. Vow not to get involved with anyone that doesn’t meet all five. Share your list with your closest friends and make them swear to tell you the truth and lock you up if you get off-track.

4. Good job. Now, let’s get crystal clear about this “dating” thing:

If you want to avoid the deadly dating traps, focus on these Four Steps for Conscious Dating:

Step One: Scouting (find compatible people to meet- internet, through friends, getting out there, etc)

Step Two: Sorting (quickly determine if someone you meet has potential)

Step Three: Screening (collect enough information to know if your requirements would be met)

Step Four: Testing (date a few times and compare the reality with the information)

Repeat as needed.

That’s it… nothing more, nothing less. No “trial relationships,” no fun flings; just these four steps.

5. Get support

Don’t do this alone. Dating can be scary and isolating, and your friends and family can be your safety net to help you stay on track.

6. Work it!

Most people meet their soul mate through someone they already know, so let people know you’re looking and network like crazy.

7. Be positive and happy

Success breeds success and misery loves company… your choice.

8. Be the Chooser!

Go after what you want and don’t simply react to what or who chooses you.

9. Be assertive!

If you settle for less, you’ll get less. Ask for what you want and say “No” to what you don’t want.

10. Live a great life NOW while you’re single. “If you build it, they will come” (from the movie “Field of Dreams”).

Finding your perfect mate is a combination of working on yourself so that you’re ready to attract and keep this wonderful person, and being proactive in your life to go after what you want instead of waiting for it to come to you, or hoping it will just “happen.”

Sunday January 13, 2013 by Debbie

Dating Tip – Don’t Text Too Soon

Don’t Rush Into Texting After The First Date

Dating Tip: Once you go on a first date, you start to build the connection if you feel the two of you clicked. First impressions are usually correct. Don’t just pay attention to the physical attraction and chemistry you feel or don’t feel. That alone won’t help you make the best decision about who he is. You will feel that you need to communicate after the first date especially if you don’t hear from him. Dating Tip – Don’t Text Too Soon. It’s great to show gratitude for having a good time but don’t text too soon.

You don’t want to come across as needy or desperate. So slow down and resist the temptation to text right away. It will also lead to lowering your confidence. You see, you will have your hopes up that he will reply right away. There is an expectation that you want more than the place where the relationship stands at this moment.

The Fundamentals Of Dating

Discover The Fundamentals of Dating

When you enter into the dating world, there are some very important factors that you need to consider and keep in mind. The most basic factor is a person’s attitude. An attitude can affect all of the dynamics of a relationship and dating experience. Attitude involves how a person looks at dating and what dating truly means to them.

Most people do not know where they should go to meet someone. They sit in their house wishing that they could meet the right person and find someone to spend their life with. However, they do not do anything to try to meet someone. They just continue to sit in their house. This decreases their chances of finding anyone that they can spend time with and enjoy having in their life.

Know why you want to date. For most people, it is a desire to no longer be alone. This is the reason that propels them to enter into the dating world again. As they are entering the dating scene, they appear desperate and needy. This is very unappealing and will lead to a pattern of attracting all the wrong kinds of people.

In order to prevent this, you have to change your thinking and picture having someone that can share your life instead of someone that will just fill the emptiness that you feel. It is nice to have someone in your life that you can spend time with and do things with, but you have to be able to enjoy your own life and be able to survive on your own before you can enjoy life with someone else.

Find the good in other people. Look for the positives. Do not focus on the bad parts, but be aware of them. These can warn you of potential warnings or dangers that you have to be aware of. Your positive attitude, however, will give you a much more open, positive mind to see people for who they really are. It will also make you more appealing to other people as they realize that you have a positive attitude and outlook.

Eliminate all of the negative words and behaviors from your mind. These words can essentially create a negative attitude and this reflects badly to other people and can give them the wrong idea about you. There is no one that desires to be with a negative person. If you remove the negative words, you increase the possibility of finding someone that you can spend your time with in a positive relationship.

Self confidence is a very desirable trait. People that are self confidence do not give off a needy or negative appearance. They are capable of surviving on their own and this makes them desirable to other people. They become a person that other people want to be with and spend time with.

Be a responsible person. Responsibility is a very attractive quality to many people. If you say you are going to do something, make sure that you do it. You do not want to have someone in your life that cannot accept responsibility, so it is important to be responsible yourself.

Attitude is the most important factor in attracting a potential mate. Attitude is essential to determining whether you will spend the rest of your life alone or if you will have a mate to live out the rest of your life with. Live your life as the kind of person that you want to attract and what you are looking for in a potential mate. If you have bad habits, you need to work to change those and adjust your behavior to be more positive.

Other people in the world are looking for the same qualities that you are. Being the best person that you can be will help you to attract the best possible mate.

What Do You Mean He’s Not That In To You?

How Could He Decide So Fast You’re Not The One . . .

He never really was into you

He just wanted to hook up. (Oh, stop sobbing. You’ve done it, too.)

He found someone he’s more into

It happens. Perhaps that lovely coworker he has been pining for suddenly left her boyfriend, whom she was just not that into.

He is tired of being dragged to church…

…and malls and family reunions and baby showers.

Your friends and family members frightened him

Maybe he sees too much of your mother in you already.

His friends finally talked him into leaving you

They whined, complained, and poked fun at him because, since you came around, he can’t come out and play after dinner.

You nag… a lot

Anytime you ask him to do something more than twice, it’s no longer a reminder, it’s nagging. Nothing makes a man want to run out of the home screaming more than nagging (excluding the obvious: A bad call during a playoff game or accidentally catching his Willy in his zipper).

He’s a slob and you’re neat, or vice-versa

You don’t realize this until you share a hotel room for a week. Then, the unmade bed, clothing pile and missing toothpaste cap are sufficient reasons to check out of both the hotel and the relationship.

You cost too much

Hey, times are tough. He has to cut corners. His hand does not require expensive foreplay such as roses, sushi and La Crema chardonnay. His accountant advised him to rebuild his credit by sticking to solo nights in a dive bar with his nutritious dinner of happy hour draft beer and popcorn.

You are not the same woman you were when he met you

Remember that sexy number you were wearing? Those high boots with your designer jeans tucked inside them. That pink lace thong. The plunging neckline. Where did they go? Yes, you look cute in sweatpants, flip-flops and a trucker cap, but then again so does his uncle.

You started rationing the cookie

You used to get busy all the time:In the car, on the kitchen counter and in the hotel Jacuzzi. You used to initiate. In fact, according to the police log, you had orgasms loud enough to register on the Richter scale. Now, instead of changing positions, you change the channels. He misses those days when you used to fetch the sex towel.

It’s not so bad. Don’t be embarrassed. You, too, can learn from this or at least become more skilled at faking it. But just accept it — he’s just not that into you.

Don’t Date The Wrong Guy

9 Warning Signs You Are Dating the Wrong Guy

Every woman has some dating doubts, but if you’re experiencing any of the following issues, perhaps you are dating the wrong guy. To find lasting love that is fulfilling and complete with true happiness, you should be aware that not everyone you date is the right guy for you.

Here are a few dating warning signs you are dating the wrong guy:

1. He thinks the world revolves around him

If your guy is more interested in how you fit in his world and he doesn’t take into consideration your individual needs, you’re certainly dating the wrong guy. You feel that your partner only thinks about himself and he always does whatever he wants, even when you don’t like his actions and he knows about it. Two things to pint out – sometimes you need to teach someone how to meet your needs and how to be a we, an us. If they are not able to give you what you need and be an us, you will become hurt and disappointed by that type of relationship – no matter how great he looks on the outside.

2. You desperately try to impress him

Do you feel like you are wearing a mask when you are with him? The trust is the trusth and being who you are around him should start right from the very beginning. Yes, it’s true that we show our very best in the beginning but if you always feels that isn’t enough – imagine how you will feel when you relax more in the relationship. If you feel less than enough for him, it’s time to realize that you needs someone who appreciates who you are. There is no one quite like you. Look for the relationship that appreciates the woman you are. Don’t be afraid to be yourself. If he doesn’t love you as you are, I promise there is someone that will and the rewards for that kind of relationship are well worth the wait.

3. He is too clingy

While most men complain about women being needy and clingy, there are guys who are more clingy than girls. If your boyfriend is one of them, you may be dating the wrong guy. It’s not healthy and wise to expect you to be his singular source of joy and happiness. You and your guy should have some alone time in order to keep the spark in your relationship. However keep in mind that you don’t want to be someone’s everything. Neediness is just not attractive and wears on a person over time. You also don’t want to feel controlled in the relationship. There is a healthy balance that needs to be created between two people. look for ways to keep it in balance and in prspective.

4. Your family and friends have never met him

Did you introduce your boyfriend to your family or friends? No? Why? Because he doesn’t want or because you are embarrassed by him so much that you don’t want your social circles to know him? If he doesn’t want to meet your family, it’s a red flag to watch out for in your relationship. Are you sure he loves you? Be sure to meet them and notice how he speaks about them, speaks about his ex’s, and how he interacts with family and friends. Is it with kindness, patience, acceptance – just look at all of it and see for yourself how things really are – then make a decision about whether or not this is right for you.

5. He doesn’t listen to you

If you feel like your partner never listens to you, you might be dating the wrong man. You feel sad and you share your emotions and feelings with him, and he starts doesn’t hear you and never notices the disappointment and sadness on your face. A woman’s deepest desire is to be listened to and understood. It creates closenesss and connection. Try praising the times he is engaged and show him how to listen when he needs you to listen. If he still isn’t able to really take in what you are saying, you have to realize that you deserve more and will be hurt if this continues. Time to think about what you need and know when can’t give it to you. Don’t settle for less than you deserve.

6. You can’t imagine your future with him

Can you see a future with your boyfriend? If the thought of a lifelong commitment makes you cringe, you need to look at what the root cause is – why are you dating him in the first place? He might be a good guy who wants to have a serious relationship but just isn’t right for you. He maybe hasn’t wanted to grow up yet. He might fear commitment. He maybe just wants a different lifestyle than you. Don’t fall in love with a guys future potential. Take a look at what he is telling you he wants in life. It is the truth. See if that is okay with you. If not, then find a guy that you can imagine a future with.

7. You are not happy when you are with him

If spending time with him exhausts you and you feel as if you want to avoid spending time with him all together – this is a warning sign you are dating the wrong guy. You should feel alive and happy with your boyfriend, not down, avoiding, making other plans, etc.Don’t let things get too routine and predictable. Try new things. Enjoy each other’s company. Dating should be fun. If not, pinpoint the problem area and make a decision about your course of action. It’s easy to let 2 , 3 4 , 5 years float by only to discover that something is just not okay when you are together. Figure it out now so that you can have the adventurous, fun relationship where you can’t wait to be together.

8. He doesn’t have any interests and hobbies

Is your relationship his only interest? If your boyfriend has no interests or hobbies outside of your relationship, perhaps you are dating the wrong guy. If he’s not passionate about anything and he doesn’t have any life goals, you shouldn’t hope that your life with him will be amazing. Sometimes people get lost. That is okay. But they can’t stay that way or retreat from participating in life. See if you can be a positive influencer in his life. Everyone needs a helping hand from time to time. If nothing takes hold, he may have some fear around failure that he has to work out for himself. Bottom line is to decide how long you can hang on without a change in him. Look at what your life will be like going forward and if that is not going to be a constant source of frustration for you.

9. You must avoid tough conversations

It’s important for couples to discuss cares and concerns and what’s next for them as a couple. If each difficult conversation, for instance, about religion, politics, or how many children you want, makes him withdrawl and there is a pattern of avoiding it all together or more than that he gets upset by your bringing up and topic or discussion you may be dating the wrong man. One thing most men need is the opportunity to know that something is coing a head of time. It is the way they are wired. So, try telling him you would like to talk to him about something important and that it is not about something he has done or not done – and tell him it will only take about 10 or 15 minutes and then ask when would be a good time for him. He may want to talk right then – stick to the timeframe you mentioned and then put your topic out there. Speak your truth. If he wants to think about it, then make sure you give him some time but tell him how important it is to hear his take on things within a day or two at the longest and then make sure that works for him If none of this works and he keeps avoiding all topis and discussions after you keep trying this method you need to ask yourself if this is what you truly want in a relationship. It’s better to discuss these issues before tying the knot. It most important to know if you have someone that can have that kind of relationship.

I know it’s hard to be alone so you might stay in a relationship knowing that something isn’t quite right. But you both don’t want to face a painful and unfulfilling relationship either. Review the 9 Warning Signs You Are Dating the Wrong Guy and see if this is true for your guy. If so, take a stand for the relationship you most want and deserve. I’m behind you all the way.

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