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Create True And Lasting Love In Your Life

Ten Things To Find Love Now

You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

1. Start by losing the losers

If you want to find your soul mate you must be available and not involved with people that aren’t right for you. Staying available is hard for a lot of singles, but necessary for finding the love of your life.

2. OK, available now? Next… are you “ready?”

Any unfinished business that might sabotage your next relationship? Legal, financial, emotional, kids, ex, employment? Get it handled!

3. Next, make a list of your top five “requirements”

Requirements are non-negotiable deal-breakers; what you must have or must not have in your relationship. Vow not to get involved with anyone that doesn’t meet all five. Share your list with your closest friends and make them swear to tell you the truth and lock you up if you get off-track.

4. Good job. Now, let’s get crystal clear about this “dating” thing:

If you want to avoid the deadly dating traps, focus on these Four Steps for Conscious Dating:

Step One: Scouting (find compatible people to meet- internet, through friends, getting out there, etc)

Step Two: Sorting (quickly determine if someone you meet has potential)

Step Three: Screening (collect enough information to know if your requirements would be met)

Step Four: Testing (date a few times and compare the reality with the information)

Repeat as needed.

That’s it… nothing more, nothing less. No “trial relationships,” no fun flings; just these four steps.

5. Get support

Don’t do this alone. Dating can be scary and isolating, and your friends and family can be your safety net to help you stay on track.

6. Work it!

Most people meet their soul mate through someone they already know, so let people know you’re looking and network like crazy.

7. Be positive and happy

Success breeds success and misery loves company… your choice.

8. Be the Chooser!

Go after what you want and don’t simply react to what or who chooses you.

9. Be assertive!

If you settle for less, you’ll get less. Ask for what you want and say “No” to what you don’t want.

10. Live a great life NOW while you’re single. “If you build it, they will come” (from the movie “Field of Dreams”).

Finding your perfect mate is a combination of working on yourself so that you’re ready to attract and keep this wonderful person, and being proactive in your life to go after what you want instead of waiting for it to come to you, or hoping it will just “happen.”

Friday January 6, 2012 by Debbie

How Your Fear Hold You Back From Love

Fear & Forgiveness: One More Step On The Journey To Love

Last night’s session touched on some very difficult topics for me. 5 ½ years ago I terminated an unplanned pregnancy. My partner and I were not married and although we had regularly discussed marriage and he totally adores children my fears overwhelmed me and I decided not to go through with it. He said that he would support me no matter what decision I made. We went through with the procedure and it was never really talked about again. Every year around the time that I would have been due I think about how old my baby would have been. Every time a friend is pregnant or someone asks me when I am going to have children I think about it. It is always there haunting me. In recent months my partner has indicated that he thinks of it often as well and has also indicated that he is sorry for the decision we made.

Last night we tried to identify some of my fears that lead to my decision.

I was afraid of what my mom would think, having a child before getting married.
I was afraid that I would be a terrible mom.
I was afraid that at some point in the future I would be faced with the situation of being a single mom just like my mom had when I was in my early teens.

Growing up I had two parents that I loved very much and they loved me but when I was twelve years old their relationship started to fall apart and at fourteen my dad left. My parents did not split amicably and my mom has struggled ever since to recover emotionally. I feel that I took on the role of caring for my mom in many ways as she cried often and seemed too weak to stand up to my father’s antics. In turn this had a negative impact on my high school years and my own person reflections on relationships with men and my ability to trust someone to love me. I was very fortunate to have been surrounded by very good friends.

This thought often crosses my mind, “No one is ever going to love me forever, no one ever has up to this point and therefore no one ever will”.

I know that I can’t change the past and I must find a way to forgive myself if I want to grow into the beautiful person I was meant to be.

You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present. ~Jan Glidewell

How Taking A Relationship Quiz Leads You To Love

What A Good Quiz For A Relationship Can Reveal

Can a quiz for a relationship really tell you anything you don’t already know? The answer is often yes, but you have to make sure you’re taking a well designed quiz created by someone with some real credentials. Find one of those and there are some very interesting things you can learn about what’s in store for your relationship.

Overall compatibility:

Don’t feel like relying on your horoscope to guide you to your soul mate? A good quiz for a relationship may not be able to tell you where your soul mate is, but it can give you an idea whether or not the person you’re with now might be it. Quiz results can give you insight into important factors like compatibility, values, viewpoints, beliefs, habits, and long-term goals.

Healthy or not?

If you’ve ever been stuck in an unhealthy relationship that involved physical or psychological abuse, no doubt you never want to be in one again. The worst thing about these situations is that it’s often hard to see where things are headed; until its too late.

That’s where a quiz for a relationship comes in. By asking the right questions, a relationship quiz can help you pick up on early warning signs, that you and your partner may not only be incompatible, but may actually be in an unhealthy situation.

Eternal love or dead end?

No matter how crazy you are about each other right now, you can never be 100% sure it will last. You can, however, get some idea, whether you have a good chance or you’re doomed to break up, though. Questions about how you envision the future with your partner and what kinds of plans you’ve made together can give you a fair amount of insight into this.

What problems are in store?

Yep, every relationship has some problems. Having an idea about what yours might be, gives you a chance to head them off before they get too serious. A well designed quiz for a relationship uses questions that help you zero in on potential problems which could grow into something bigger and be a deal breaker.

The quiz does this by asking questions like how do you deal with your partner’s annoying habits, what causes of any moments of tension between you, and what emotions seem to characterize your relationship.

How others see you!

Even if there aren’t any problems between you, your relationship could still face pressure from outside forces. It might be due to difference in age, race, social status, or any number of things you overlook when you’re deeply inlove. Unfortunately, your family and close friends, may not overlook these things and constant criticism from them can put a strain on the relationship. You need to be aware of what social problems you might run into so you can discuss how you’re going to handle them.

A quiz for a relationship can tell you a lot about what you and your partner have to look forward to in the near future. Just remember, though, no two relationships are the same, so no matter how accurate the test, be ready for a few surprises all the same.

Ready For Love?

Are You Ready For Love?

Getting to the heart of what holds you back.

If someone were to ask you what you really wanted from a relationship – what would the answer be?

It’s that time of year when not only are we busier at work than ever, but our personal lives are about to get busier as well! So many really wonderful women I know are juggling multiple commitments, and let’s face it, part of being successful and happy is being well-rounded. It’s only natural that we want to make the most of all the opportunities around us!

But one often overlooked aspect of “making the most” of our opportunities is cultivating a sense of joy, presence and awareness about ourselves. Your awareness is important because it keeps you from being caught up in a whirlwind of activity just for the sake of being busy or collecting accolades.

Sometimes you focus on or play up one particular part of your identity, while completely disregarding other parts of yourselves. You have many facets and dimensions. Time to look at all of them and express some of the ignored diemsions by enjoying them.

I want to encourage you to take a little time – and get clarity about who you are, and who and what you need in your life. This is the perfect time to examine this! No time like the present.

What Choices Are You Making With Your Love Life

Know What Holds You Back From Finding Love

Has love escaped you – time for a change

1. Be Smart About Who’s In Your Life (and Why).

Is there a man you’re considering letting get closer? Are you ready to date again, light up some sparks and flirt with someone new? Any relationship or dating that’s on the horizon will result in a much deeper, more effective connection if you’ve cultivated that joy and awareness mentioned above. Know what holds you back from finding love. Work through the questions below:

Do you consider yourself wise and trusting your own intuition when it comes to the relationships in your life? In other words, do the people you allow into your life reflect who you are and what you stand for? I’m not talking just about romantic love, but what about even your coworkers, friends and family?

And, of course, what about the men you date? What does it mean that you’ve allowed these particular individuals in? That you devote any of your time to them? Believe it or not, being intentionally conscious of your perspective on this has a great impact on who you connect with romantically, and even has an impact on your overall confidence.

Here’s another question: do your decisions, large and small, align with your core values? Do you act in your own best interest? Are you able to speak your truth and ask for what you really need with ease and confidence? Better yet, do you know for sure what you really need from a lasting relationship?

If you don’t develop this part of yourself, you’ll forever be in a cycle of feeling like the world isn’t listening to you. And all too often, an underlying frustration will be at the center of your universe. We all know how helpful that is, right?

Are there patterns you see? Destructive patterns? Repeat dating patterns that keep you single? Ways you sabotage or talk someone right out of loving you? Do you pick the same guy over and over again?

This week, take a little time out for yourself and start looking at the men you’ve invited into your life. Make a mental list of their qualities and what the relationship brought to you. Was it pain or joy? Did you feel seen or heard by them? Loved, cherished, adored and respected? Don’t restrict yourself. There’s no judgement here. Just a time to reevaluate.

Unless you are centered about your core values, know what you need, and stop repeating patterns you’ll have trouble getting what you want and need from a man, no matter how fantastic he is. It really is in your hands, and self-knowledge is the first step to getting what you most want.

2. Gain a Fresh Perspective: Flirting is Natural, Dating is Fun, and You Can Connect More Deeply with the Men You Meet.

Finally, I want you to know one thing: you already are an amazing woman. You have everything you need to have to meet the guy. There are really only two things that ever hold you back – 1) You are not ready 2) You don’t know how

We are all in different phases of our journey, and that is fine and perfectly healthy. The fact that you are here and reading my articles illustrates that you want more in life and in love. That means so much to me. You deserve all the joy and happiness you’re seeking, regardless of your relationship status at the moment. You deserve it simply because you are you!

Be sure to answer the questions above and find out where you are and how the answers will help you go forward. I am here if you need extra help.

Can 20 Minutes Change Your Love Life?

Ten Things To Find Love Now

You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

How Your Fear Hold You Back From Love

Online Dating Profile Redo