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Ten Things To Find Love Now

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You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

1. Start by losing the losers

If you want to find your soul mate you must be available and not involved with people that aren’t right for you. Staying available is hard for a lot of singles, but necessary for finding the love of your life.

2. OK, available now? Next… are you “ready?”

Any unfinished business that might sabotage your next relationship? Legal, financial, emotional, kids, ex, employment? Get it handled!

3. Next, make a list of your top five “requirements”

Requirements are non-negotiable deal-breakers; what you must have or must not have in your relationship. Vow not to get involved with anyone that doesn’t meet all five. Share your list with your closest friends and make them swear to tell you the truth and lock you up if you get off-track.

4. Good job. Now, let’s get crystal clear about this “dating” thing:

If you want to avoid the deadly dating traps, focus on these Four Steps for Conscious Dating:

Step One: Scouting (find compatible people to meet- internet, through friends, getting out there, etc)

Step Two: Sorting (quickly determine if someone you meet has potential)

Step Three: Screening (collect enough information to know if your requirements would be met)

Step Four: Testing (date a few times and compare the reality with the information)

Repeat as needed.

That’s it… nothing more, nothing less. No “trial relationships,” no fun flings; just these four steps.

5. Get support

Don’t do this alone. Dating can be scary and isolating, and your friends and family can be your safety net to help you stay on track.

6. Work it!

Most people meet their soul mate through someone they already know, so let people know you’re looking and network like crazy.

7. Be positive and happy

Success breeds success and misery loves company… your choice.

8. Be the Chooser!

Go after what you want and don’t simply react to what or who chooses you.

9. Be assertive!

If you settle for less, you’ll get less. Ask for what you want and say “No” to what you don’t want.

10. Live a great life NOW while you’re single. “If you build it, they will come” (from the movie “Field of Dreams”).

Finding your perfect mate is a combination of working on yourself so that you’re ready to attract and keep this wonderful person, and being proactive in your life to go after what you want instead of waiting for it to come to you, or hoping it will just “happen.”

 

© Relationship Coaching Institute | All rights reserved | Used with permission

 

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You are here: Home / Breakup Help / How To Get Over Someone Special A Gals Guide

Sunday April 14, 2013 by Debbie

How To Get Over Someone Special A Gals Guide

Getting Over A Guy

alt=""Are you wondering how to get over someone special who meant the world to you?

Was the break up a surprise and now you are left adrift? Here’s some advice on how to get over someone special.

First of all, determine whether the relationship is truly over. If you still harbor getting back together, you will not be able to get over the person. You can hang on to a guy for days, months, or even years when there is no hope. Until you decide it’s over, it’s not – even if the love is not reciprocated. You are not able to move on until you let go and take steps to get over someone special.

Once you have decided it really is over, take concrete steps to end the relationship so you will be able to get over someone special. For one thing, do a property exchange. Pack up all of the things he has at your house and ship them to him. Get rid of everything – including his toothbrush. Ask for anything of yours back that he has. Clearing yourself of each other’s things will launch you into your new single status. That is the first step to get over someone special.

If you have financial entanglements, get them straightened up right away. This may be as simple as paying him back the $20 he lent you last week at the mall or it can be as complicated as refinancing a house. Whatever you have to do, do it as soon as possible so that your finances are no longer intermeshed.

You have to decide what to do about people and places you have in common too. It is not uncommon for a couple to decide “who gets the church” , “the restaurant”, etc after a break up. Sometimes it is not healthy to continue to run into a person with whom you no longer have a romantic relationship.

Similarly, you may have to “divorce” some of his friends. While they didn’t do anything to you, they have always been closer to him than you. While you can still be polite and friendly when you occasionally run into them, they may be people that you don’t want to contact on a regular basis any longer.

Next, you need to start to have a new life. If you were close to the person you have broken up with, you probably spent a lot of time with him. This is time that you will have to fill with new people and activities.

Perhaps you let relationships with friends and family die when you started getting involved with your ex. This is a good time to renew these relationships.

It is also a good time to work on making new relationships. You probably spent time doing things your ex wanted to do but that didn’t thrill you. Take advantage of this time to launch your own hobbies and interests. You could take a writing class at the local university, take a dance class at an aerobics studio, start a scrapbooking circle with a group from church, or get season tickets to the opera. As you get involved with these things that interest you, you will meet new people and move forward while you will definitely take the steps to get over someone special.

It is very likely that your next boyfriend will grow out of the new circle of people you meet through your new activities. And, hooking up again is the very best way to get over someone special!

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Sweet Things To Say To Your Boyfriend

Appreciate The Things Your Boyfriend Does

There are many sweet things to say to your boyfriend. Sometimes just saying something nice can pull him out of a funk. If you have had a fight, it’s worth coming up with something nice to say. It is amazing how much your boyfriend will turn towards you instead of pull away by remembering to praise the things he does right. This article will explore some of the sweet things to say to your boyfriend.

It’s just too easy to get caught up in the day to day aspects of life. Sometimes making a conscious effort to break the pattern and surprise him with something sweet can reignite the passion in your relationship. Appreciate the little things by telling him what he does right in the relationship – like sending a text to you, bringing you your favorite treat, etc.

But, remember that timing is important when you have sweet things to say to your boyfriend. For instance, saying them in front of his friends is likely to embarrass him or make him mad. Don’t try to wiggle out of a fight by saying sweet things either. This is the time to try to resolve issues not to cover them up with pleasantries. Besides guys don’t like drama and chaos so he won’t be in a place to hear the sweet things. You have to wait a while and give him time to cool off.

Think about the context of the words. For instance, saying sweet things when he is on the way out the door to a basketball game with his buddies may come across as a way to keep him home. But saying sweet things to say to your boyfriend during a romantic dinner may come across as loving. Pay attention to what is happening to him in the moment. Men tend to focus on one thing at a time. So take note of where he’s at and where his focus is at the time.

When coming up with sweet things to say to your boyfriend, keep in mind what will please him. This will vary from man to man. Therefore, I cannot make a list of 100 things that are pleasing. Instead, I can guide you in the kind of thought processes to go through.

For instance, you should consider his actions. If there are things he does that please you, complement him on them. Not only is this sweet, but it reinforces behaviors that you appreciate too.

You can also compliment him on his appearance. The perception is that gals need more complements on their looks, but guys appreciate this too!

Some of the sweet things to say to your boyfriend involve his skills. Is he a great cook or handy around the house? Let him know. Does he have great social skills? Do you admire his relationship with his family? These are all the basis for sweet comments.

If his personality is something that drew you to him, let him know. He may be insecure about being a “nice guy” so your reassurances that his personality is great will help him a lot.

Of course, there are plenty of great things to say about his sexuality. Even if you haven’t gone to bed with him, you can always compliment him on his kissing. But, if you have gone all the way, think about making him feel like a real stud.

There are many sweet things to say to your boyfriend. Come up with the right words and the right time and you’ll be his for life.

How Taking A Relationship Quiz Leads You To Love

What A Good Quiz For A Relationship Can Reveal 

 

Can a quiz for a relationship really tell you anything you don’t already know? The answer is often yes, but you have to make sure you’re taking a well designed quiz created by someone with some real credentials. Find one of those and there are some very interesting things you can learn about what’s in store for your relationship.

 

Overall compatibility:

 

Don’t feel like relying on your horoscope to guide you to your soul mate? A good quiz for a relationship may not be able to tell you where your soul mate is, but it can give you an idea whether or not the person you’re with now might be it. Quiz results can give you insight into important factors like compatibility, values, viewpoints, beliefs, habits, and long-term goals.

 

Healthy or not?

 

If you’ve ever been stuck in an unhealthy relationship that involved physical or psychological abuse, no doubt you never want to be in one again. The worst thing about these situations is that it’s often hard to see where things are headed; until its too late.

 

That’s where a quiz for a relationship comes in. By asking the right questions, a relationship quiz can help you pick up on early warning signs, that you and your partner may not only be incompatible, but may actually be in an unhealthy situation.

 

Eternal love or dead end?

 

No matter how crazy you are about each other right now, you can never be 100% sure it will last. You can, however, get some idea, whether you have a good chance or you’re doomed to break up, though. Questions about how you envision the future with your partner and what kinds of plans you’ve made together can give you a fair amount of insight into this.

 

What problems are in store?

 

Yep, every relationship has some problems. Having an idea about what yours might be, gives you a chance to head them off before they get too serious. A well designed quiz for a relationship uses questions that help you zero in on potential problems which could grow into something bigger and be a deal breaker.

 

The quiz does this by asking questions like how do you deal with your partner’s annoying habits, what causes of any moments of tension between you, and what emotions seem to characterize your relationship.

 

How others see you!

 

Even if there aren’t any problems between you, your relationship could still face pressure from outside forces. It might be due to difference in age, race, social status, or any number of things you overlook when you’re deeply inlove. Unfortunately, your family and close friends, may not overlook these things and constant criticism from them can put a strain on the relationship. You need to be aware of what social problems you might run into so you can discuss how you’re going to handle them.

 

A quiz for a relationship can tell you a lot about what you and your partner have to look forward to in the near future. Just remember, though, no two relationships are the same, so no matter how accurate the test, be ready for a few surprises all the same.

alt="Rebound Love After A Breakup"

Broken Relationships Rebound The Smart Way

 Rebound Love After A BreakupShould You Fall In Love On The Rebound?

How many times have you seen one of your friends break up with a long-term partner only to find, the very next week, rebound with someone who was obviously all wrong for them? It’s one of the most common after effects of the end of relationships: rebound dating.

The idea of rebound relationships is so ingrained into the way we think about dating that it just seems natural to look for one after a breakup. There’s something to be said for getting “back in the saddle,” choosing a partner when your judgment is clouded usually does more harm than good overall. If you want to get over your ex fast, there are better ways to do it.

Band-Aid relationships: rebound mindset

The first step to keeping yourself from doing something you’ll regret is to take an honest look at what you’re feeling and understand how those feelings can lead you places you’d rather not go. A lot of times we just miss the companionship and look for someone to fill the gap in our schedule and distract us from the fact that our heart’s just been broken. In that case, make a point of finding a social time-filler that doesn’t involve romance.

 

Maintain your standards

 

The best thing you can do to avoid getting involved with someone who’s all wrong for you is stick to your standards. In fact, go ahead and raise them a little just to add a safety buffer. If the person you’re thinking about dating is less kind, less intelligent, less anything that you’d normally want, stay away. The people don’t make for good relationships, rebound or otherwise.

 

Beware of the handiest person

 

When we look for someone to rebound with, we need someone fast. We don’t have time to “waste” looking for someone we really click with, so we tend to latch on to someone we already know and have at least some rapport with. It might be a close friend, a co-worker, even someone who works at the grocery store down the street. If you find yourself falling for someone you’ve never been the least bit attracted to before, stop and think about what’s really going on here.

Take time for yourself

Instead of filling your time with go-nowhere dates, get out and make some new friends (that’s “friends,” not “lovers.” There’s a difference.) Get involved in something you’ve always wanted to do but never had time for. Whatever you do, don’t sit around pining for your ex or scouring the bookstore shelves for self help books.

Be gentle with yourself.

Even if your not sobbing into your pillow every night, the end of a relationship will naturally make you feel a little bummed out and low on energy. Take that into account and try not to start any major projects for a few weeks. Instead, treat yourself to some time out to do something you enjoy.

Of course, not every rebound relationship ends up a disaster. If you’re lucky, you’ll have a fun fling. If you do decide to get involved with someone after a breakup, though, make sure you’ve taken a little off by yourself and you’re not lowering your standards. While we can prevent broken relationships: rebound dates gone wrong are easy to avoid.

 

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