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Create True And Lasting Love In Your Life

Ten Things To Find Love Now

You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

1. Start by losing the losers

If you want to find your soul mate you must be available and not involved with people that aren’t right for you. Staying available is hard for a lot of singles, but necessary for finding the love of your life.

2. OK, available now? Next… are you “ready?”

Any unfinished business that might sabotage your next relationship? Legal, financial, emotional, kids, ex, employment? Get it handled!

3. Next, make a list of your top five “requirements”

Requirements are non-negotiable deal-breakers; what you must have or must not have in your relationship. Vow not to get involved with anyone that doesn’t meet all five. Share your list with your closest friends and make them swear to tell you the truth and lock you up if you get off-track.

4. Good job. Now, let’s get crystal clear about this “dating” thing:

If you want to avoid the deadly dating traps, focus on these Four Steps for Conscious Dating:

Step One: Scouting (find compatible people to meet- internet, through friends, getting out there, etc)

Step Two: Sorting (quickly determine if someone you meet has potential)

Step Three: Screening (collect enough information to know if your requirements would be met)

Step Four: Testing (date a few times and compare the reality with the information)

Repeat as needed.

That’s it… nothing more, nothing less. No “trial relationships,” no fun flings; just these four steps.

5. Get support

Don’t do this alone. Dating can be scary and isolating, and your friends and family can be your safety net to help you stay on track.

6. Work it!

Most people meet their soul mate through someone they already know, so let people know you’re looking and network like crazy.

7. Be positive and happy

Success breeds success and misery loves company… your choice.

8. Be the Chooser!

Go after what you want and don’t simply react to what or who chooses you.

9. Be assertive!

If you settle for less, you’ll get less. Ask for what you want and say “No” to what you don’t want.

10. Live a great life NOW while you’re single. “If you build it, they will come” (from the movie “Field of Dreams”).

Finding your perfect mate is a combination of working on yourself so that you’re ready to attract and keep this wonderful person, and being proactive in your life to go after what you want instead of waiting for it to come to you, or hoping it will just “happen.”

Resouces

The Ten Principles of Conscious Dating

Follow the follow principles:

1. Know who you are and what you want.

Like an iceberg, we are typically aware only of the tip, while our success and happiness depends upon what lies below the surface.

2. Learn how to get what you want.

Assess the information, tools, and skills you will need and acquire them. Develop creative strategies and action plans. “When you fail to plan, you plan to fail.”

3. Be the “Chooser.”

Take initiative and responsibility for your outcomes. Don’t react to what, or who, chooses you. Seek to create what you want in your life.

4. Balance your heart with your head.

Make your relationship choices consciously. It’s still exciting!

5. Be ready and available for commitment.

Live your life and bring your dating strategy into alignment with how ready you really are for a committed relationship.

6. Use the “Law Of Attraction.”

Be the partner that you are seeking. Attract the partner that you want by developing yourself and living the life that you want. “If you build it, they will come.”

7. Gain relationship knowledge and skills.

Prepare for the love of your life by learning about relationships, improving your relationship skills, and deepening your relationships with your family, friends, and colleagues. Date for fun and practice. Take more emotional risks. Read about relationships. Get relationship coaching. Take relationship classes and workshops.

8. Create a support community.

Isolated singles become lonely in their relationships when they focus on a partner to meet all their social and emotional needs.

9. Practice assertiveness.

To get what you really want, you need to say “No” to what you don’t want.

10. Be a “Successful Single.”

Don’t put your life on hold waiting for a relationship to happen. Live your life vision and purpose while you are single. The best way to find your life partner is to be a happy, successful single person living the life that you really want.

Ready For Love?

Are You Ready For Love?

Getting to the heart of what holds you back.

If someone were to ask you what you really wanted from a relationship – what would the answer be?

It’s that time of year when not only are we busier at work than ever, but our personal lives are about to get busier as well! So many really wonderful women I know are juggling multiple commitments, and let’s face it, part of being successful and happy is being well-rounded. It’s only natural that we want to make the most of all the opportunities around us!

But one often overlooked aspect of “making the most” of our opportunities is cultivating a sense of joy, presence and awareness about ourselves. Your awareness is important because it keeps you from being caught up in a whirlwind of activity just for the sake of being busy or collecting accolades.

Sometimes you focus on or play up one particular part of your identity, while completely disregarding other parts of yourselves. You have many facets and dimensions. Time to look at all of them and express some of the ignored diemsions by enjoying them.

I want to encourage you to take a little time – and get clarity about who you are, and who and what you need in your life. This is the perfect time to examine this! No time like the present.

Don’t Date The Wrong Guy

9 Warning Signs You Are Dating the Wrong Guy

Every woman has some dating doubts, but if you’re experiencing any of the following issues, perhaps you are dating the wrong guy. To find lasting love that is fulfilling and complete with true happiness, you should be aware that not everyone you date is the right guy for you.

Here are a few dating warning signs you are dating the wrong guy:

1. He thinks the world revolves around him

If your guy is more interested in how you fit in his world and he doesn’t take into consideration your individual needs, you’re certainly dating the wrong guy. You feel that your partner only thinks about himself and he always does whatever he wants, even when you don’t like his actions and he knows about it. Two things to pint out – sometimes you need to teach someone how to meet your needs and how to be a we, an us. If they are not able to give you what you need and be an us, you will become hurt and disappointed by that type of relationship – no matter how great he looks on the outside.

2. You desperately try to impress him

Do you feel like you are wearing a mask when you are with him? The trust is the trusth and being who you are around him should start right from the very beginning. Yes, it’s true that we show our very best in the beginning but if you always feels that isn’t enough – imagine how you will feel when you relax more in the relationship. If you feel less than enough for him, it’s time to realize that you needs someone who appreciates who you are. There is no one quite like you. Look for the relationship that appreciates the woman you are. Don’t be afraid to be yourself. If he doesn’t love you as you are, I promise there is someone that will and the rewards for that kind of relationship are well worth the wait.

3. He is too clingy

While most men complain about women being needy and clingy, there are guys who are more clingy than girls. If your boyfriend is one of them, you may be dating the wrong guy. It’s not healthy and wise to expect you to be his singular source of joy and happiness. You and your guy should have some alone time in order to keep the spark in your relationship. However keep in mind that you don’t want to be someone’s everything. Neediness is just not attractive and wears on a person over time. You also don’t want to feel controlled in the relationship. There is a healthy balance that needs to be created between two people. look for ways to keep it in balance and in prspective.

4. Your family and friends have never met him

Did you introduce your boyfriend to your family or friends? No? Why? Because he doesn’t want or because you are embarrassed by him so much that you don’t want your social circles to know him? If he doesn’t want to meet your family, it’s a red flag to watch out for in your relationship. Are you sure he loves you? Be sure to meet them and notice how he speaks about them, speaks about his ex’s, and how he interacts with family and friends. Is it with kindness, patience, acceptance – just look at all of it and see for yourself how things really are – then make a decision about whether or not this is right for you.

5. He doesn’t listen to you

If you feel like your partner never listens to you, you might be dating the wrong man. You feel sad and you share your emotions and feelings with him, and he starts doesn’t hear you and never notices the disappointment and sadness on your face. A woman’s deepest desire is to be listened to and understood. It creates closenesss and connection. Try praising the times he is engaged and show him how to listen when he needs you to listen. If he still isn’t able to really take in what you are saying, you have to realize that you deserve more and will be hurt if this continues. Time to think about what you need and know when can’t give it to you. Don’t settle for less than you deserve.

6. You can’t imagine your future with him

Can you see a future with your boyfriend? If the thought of a lifelong commitment makes you cringe, you need to look at what the root cause is – why are you dating him in the first place? He might be a good guy who wants to have a serious relationship but just isn’t right for you. He maybe hasn’t wanted to grow up yet. He might fear commitment. He maybe just wants a different lifestyle than you. Don’t fall in love with a guys future potential. Take a look at what he is telling you he wants in life. It is the truth. See if that is okay with you. If not, then find a guy that you can imagine a future with.

7. You are not happy when you are with him

If spending time with him exhausts you and you feel as if you want to avoid spending time with him all together – this is a warning sign you are dating the wrong guy. You should feel alive and happy with your boyfriend, not down, avoiding, making other plans, etc.Don’t let things get too routine and predictable. Try new things. Enjoy each other’s company. Dating should be fun. If not, pinpoint the problem area and make a decision about your course of action. It’s easy to let 2 , 3 4 , 5 years float by only to discover that something is just not okay when you are together. Figure it out now so that you can have the adventurous, fun relationship where you can’t wait to be together.

8. He doesn’t have any interests and hobbies

Is your relationship his only interest? If your boyfriend has no interests or hobbies outside of your relationship, perhaps you are dating the wrong guy. If he’s not passionate about anything and he doesn’t have any life goals, you shouldn’t hope that your life with him will be amazing. Sometimes people get lost. That is okay. But they can’t stay that way or retreat from participating in life. See if you can be a positive influencer in his life. Everyone needs a helping hand from time to time. If nothing takes hold, he may have some fear around failure that he has to work out for himself. Bottom line is to decide how long you can hang on without a change in him. Look at what your life will be like going forward and if that is not going to be a constant source of frustration for you.

9. You must avoid tough conversations

It’s important for couples to discuss cares and concerns and what’s next for them as a couple. If each difficult conversation, for instance, about religion, politics, or how many children you want, makes him withdrawl and there is a pattern of avoiding it all together or more than that he gets upset by your bringing up and topic or discussion you may be dating the wrong man. One thing most men need is the opportunity to know that something is coing a head of time. It is the way they are wired. So, try telling him you would like to talk to him about something important and that it is not about something he has done or not done – and tell him it will only take about 10 or 15 minutes and then ask when would be a good time for him. He may want to talk right then – stick to the timeframe you mentioned and then put your topic out there. Speak your truth. If he wants to think about it, then make sure you give him some time but tell him how important it is to hear his take on things within a day or two at the longest and then make sure that works for him If none of this works and he keeps avoiding all topis and discussions after you keep trying this method you need to ask yourself if this is what you truly want in a relationship. It’s better to discuss these issues before tying the knot. It most important to know if you have someone that can have that kind of relationship.

I know it’s hard to be alone so you might stay in a relationship knowing that something isn’t quite right. But you both don’t want to face a painful and unfulfilling relationship either. Review the 9 Warning Signs You Are Dating the Wrong Guy and see if this is true for your guy. If so, take a stand for the relationship you most want and deserve. I’m behind you all the way.

What Choices Are You Making With Your Love Life

Know What Holds You Back From Finding Love

Has love escaped you – time for a change

1. Be Smart About Who’s In Your Life (and Why).

Is there a man you’re considering letting get closer? Are you ready to date again, light up some sparks and flirt with someone new? Any relationship or dating that’s on the horizon will result in a much deeper, more effective connection if you’ve cultivated that joy and awareness mentioned above. Know what holds you back from finding love. Work through the questions below:

Do you consider yourself wise and trusting your own intuition when it comes to the relationships in your life? In other words, do the people you allow into your life reflect who you are and what you stand for? I’m not talking just about romantic love, but what about even your coworkers, friends and family?

And, of course, what about the men you date? What does it mean that you’ve allowed these particular individuals in? That you devote any of your time to them? Believe it or not, being intentionally conscious of your perspective on this has a great impact on who you connect with romantically, and even has an impact on your overall confidence.

Here’s another question: do your decisions, large and small, align with your core values? Do you act in your own best interest? Are you able to speak your truth and ask for what you really need with ease and confidence? Better yet, do you know for sure what you really need from a lasting relationship?

If you don’t develop this part of yourself, you’ll forever be in a cycle of feeling like the world isn’t listening to you. And all too often, an underlying frustration will be at the center of your universe. We all know how helpful that is, right?

Are there patterns you see? Destructive patterns? Repeat dating patterns that keep you single? Ways you sabotage or talk someone right out of loving you? Do you pick the same guy over and over again?

This week, take a little time out for yourself and start looking at the men you’ve invited into your life. Make a mental list of their qualities and what the relationship brought to you. Was it pain or joy? Did you feel seen or heard by them? Loved, cherished, adored and respected? Don’t restrict yourself. There’s no judgement here. Just a time to reevaluate.

Unless you are centered about your core values, know what you need, and stop repeating patterns you’ll have trouble getting what you want and need from a man, no matter how fantastic he is. It really is in your hands, and self-knowledge is the first step to getting what you most want.

2. Gain a Fresh Perspective: Flirting is Natural, Dating is Fun, and You Can Connect More Deeply with the Men You Meet.

Finally, I want you to know one thing: you already are an amazing woman. You have everything you need to have to meet the guy. There are really only two things that ever hold you back – 1) You are not ready 2) You don’t know how

We are all in different phases of our journey, and that is fine and perfectly healthy. The fact that you are here and reading my articles illustrates that you want more in life and in love. That means so much to me. You deserve all the joy and happiness you’re seeking, regardless of your relationship status at the moment. You deserve it simply because you are you!

Be sure to answer the questions above and find out where you are and how the answers will help you go forward. I am here if you need extra help.

Can 20 Minutes Change Your Love Life?